In my life there has been a recurring danger that I’ve lacked the courage to address, until recently. Within my passions, whether it be writing, art or business, I would arrive at an intersection. It was a peculiar place—a place where my desires and my feelings of inadequacy would collide. I’d stall there often. My growth halted. I’d sit there loathing this awkward standstill. The stutter in progress caused me frustration and doubt. Why? Why must I linger here?! Why don’t I take another route? Stupid intersection!
Have you ever wondered why some people leap for their dreams while others dig their feet deeper into the trench of stagnation? Do the dream chasers have leaper’s luck? Do they have the “leaper” gene as part of their DNA. Or, perhaps the ones who leapt are supremely talented, know the right people, have a whole heap of ambition and possess an obscene amount of passion. Maybe. Maybe not.
What do the following phrases sound like to you?
· Youʼre fired!
· I want a divorce.
· Youʼre not what weʼre looking for.
If you answered rejection, you’re correct. Rejection is a clear sign that a door has closed, but more than that, rejection tells us that weʼre not where we need to be. It could also mean we are supposed to grow in a particular area.
No form of rejection is easy to digest, especially when our pride is hurt. And unfortunately, if we never get past our wounded pride, it will be impossible to make a dignified transition after the rejection.
When’s the last time you were discouraged from dreaming and encouraged instead to work? “Get your head out of the clouds, boy and get to work.” Or, “get your head out of the clouds, girl and get to work.” Sound familiar? Perhaps it was something you heard as a young child.
And, so we work…year after year. Amongst a maze of busyness, constant distractions, family and friends lies the tiny seed of a dream. We all have the seed of a dream, but forget to nourish it with…
We know a lot of people in search of the perfect 9 to 5. Guilty. Will I fit in? Will I like my new boss? What about the commute…how long of a drive will it be? Will I be able to pickup and drop off the kids in time? What should I wear? All of these decisions to be made. And yet many of us make them while sleep deprived. We overlook the most important 9 to 5…and that’s going to bed by a decent time (9 p.m.) and rising early (5 a.m.).
We gave ourselves a solid month to write and publish our ebook, The Art of More. We put a deadline out for the world to see. It was uncomfortable, yet motivating. It’s one thing when you know a deadline that you may or may not keep. It’s a whole different ballgame when you put it out there for other people to track as well. If you’re committed to see your dream through, try it.
What is Self-Talk?
Do you remember seeing commercials or movies where a person had a devil on one shoulder and an angel on another? The devil would speak bad stuff while the angel would speak good. Well, that’s a good way to explain what self-talk is. It’s the constant inner dialogue we have with ourselves. Good talk (angel). Bad talk (devil). Give the speakers the avatar that’s most suitable to your taste…good talk (Thor), bad talk (Loki). Whatever helps.
On December 1, 2017, I whipped my dusty black Camaro into a parking space outside our office building as I had many Fridays before. I’m well into my work routine…when [ping] an emailed with the subject line “Lakisha Fox_Termination_12/4/2017…” hit my work inbox. It’s shortly after 9:00 am. I don’t flinch. I’m determined to remain poised.